A Few Words on Spiritual Bypassing and Influencer Culture…

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The topic of spiritual bypassing has been on my mind for a long time now. It’s one of the MANY reasons I’ve grown so allergic to social media over the past few years, and it’s also something that I’ve come across within the various “spiritual healing” communities that I’ve interacted with over the past decade or so. As a spiritual seeker myself who has attended many healing ceremonies both IRL and online, I’ve been dismayed at witnessing the breathtaking lack of deep healing work by some of the folks out there marketing themselves as spiritual healers, life coaches, and yes even psychotherapists and psychologists. This means they’re out there, serving you and me as “healers” when they’ve avoided dealing with their own unhealed wounds.
Is this who you want to be taking advice from?

Here’s a nugget of truth for you: everyone born on this planet is in need of healing of some sort at one point or another. Not one of us is immune. Yup. I realize that’s not a sexy statement. But it’s the truth.

Here’s another nugget: there are plenty of so-called “healers” out there who have avoided doing their own repair work, yet are really charismatic marketers with huge online followings. Why does this concern me so much? Well, when you’ve worked with as many clients as I have who’ve come to you in tears because the advice they’ve been given by their previous coach/therapist/healer is damaging, you sit up and take notice. I often find myself spending the first few sessions helping my clients unlearn a lot of what they had assumed was carefully curated advice by someone they trusted or viewed as a subject matter expert. And don’t even get me started on the heartbreaking stories of clients who’ve come to me needing to process psychological, emotional, physical and/or sexual traumas inflicted on them by the very unregulated but very popular healers they sought help from. I offer free consults before working with any client; and I’m continuously amazed/saddened that in all my years of practice, I’ve only ever had ONE potential client ask me the most important question of all: “Do you have your own therapist, Sandy?”
Of course the answer is HELLLLLLLLLLL YA!!!!

This past weekend, after listening to a few episodes of the “Kumbaya Confessional” podcast (which I HIGHLY recommend, as it touches on the problematic themes within what the podcaster terms as the “WooSphere”), I went down the rabbit hole of reviewing, with discernment, all the accounts and hashtags that I’d been following on my social media platforms. It’s an exercise I recommend everyone practice regularly. Energy is everywhere around us, and it’s important for each of us to be more mindful of the content we’re ingesting because each post, each photo, each video, each comment on each social media post leaves an energetic imprint on our mind, body and spirit, even if unconsciously.

As a trained mind-body-spirit helping professional, I felt compelled to address this topic head on. Over the past few years (and goodness, especially over the past year during Covid times!), I’ve noticed an explosion of social media posts that espouse toxic positivity and spiritual bypassing as veritable, one-size fits all solutions to ALL! YOUR!! PROBLEMS!!!! I’ve been watching the plethora of such distressing content, truth be told with the same level of dismay one would give to watching an accident about to happen in slow motion.

Truth bomb: there is a LOT of really positive-sounding, yet pithily trite advice from “influencers” right here on this platform as well as across all social media; a lot of them have millions of followers and are seemingly quite successful. Yes, I’m all for freedom of expression and creativity. The year 2020 brought me a lot of lessons; and one of them is that we are living in THE time for digital content creators to shine and thrive and offer their services! This is a good thing. These digital platforms we have access to afford us the opportunity to spread information far and wide (within mere seconds!) around this beautiful blue planet. It’s an exciting time for those of us who like to create and share! Especially those of us who see our roles as healers in service to humanity. However, stepping into such roles comes with a weight of responsibility because what you put out into the world will be the advice that dozens, hundreds, thousands or millions of people will read and accept as gospel for years to come. Because it’s preserved ON THE INTERNET. ForEVER. Anyone can create a pretty and profound-sounding yet pithy meme filled with toxic problematic advice that will not only NOT help you achieve your goals, but will keep you in stuckness because it encourages you to spiritually bypass your actual, real-life problems.

So. What to do, you ask?

I invite you to be more discerning with what you’re taking in online. And I encourage you to continuously ask yourself whether you are engaging in any toxic, spiritually bypassing behaviour yourself. Here are some questions to ask yourself:

Are you discerning the content you’re ingesting, day after day? Scroll after scroll?

How is that content making you feel?

Is that content offering you temporary escapism while you continue ignoring what’s right in front of you?

Have you been ignoring dealing with your SELF? The self inside that houses both light AND shadow?

Be honest: have you been all “GOOD VIBES ONLY!” and “LOVE AND LIGHT!” while ignoring your Shadow inside?

Have you been avoiding doing your deep healing work because you’ve convinced yourself that taking advice from memes instead of checking-in with your Self, studying self-help books (and applying their teachings to your life) and/or working with a trained mental health professional to help guide you along your healing journey is the easier path?

Have you asked yourself who you’ve been taking advice from online (and what their qualifications are)?

Have you asked your guru/healer what efforts they’ve been taking to actively heal from their own wounds?

And after you’ve heard their answer, did you check in with your gut/intuition to discern whether their answer makes sense to you?

Most important of all, have you been hindering your personal growth by spiritually bypassing?

_{Sandy Kiaizadeh is a Registered Psychotherapist, Life Coach and Spiritual Healer at Toronto’s Mindful Solutions Clinic. For more information about Sandy and her services, please visit http://www.mindfulsolutionsclinic.com.}

Covid-19 Update: Office News

Sandy Kiaizadeh is a registered psychotherapist in Toronto, Ontario, Canada.

Well, here we all are, two months into Toronto’s battle against a worldwide pandemic that has quickly evolved into a very serious health and financial crisis. What a difference ten weeks can make, right?

The Ontario government has begun its plans for re-opening some services as of today, May 19, 2020. While they’ve included some health services in their Phase 1 plan, it will always be my priority to minimize risk to both myself and each of my clients. I continue to monitor the situation closely, and am following the direction given to me by both my regulatory college and professional association.

Both have strongly advised against any return to in-office sessions for now given nothing about the virus’ contagion has changed since March’s initial stay-at-home orders were first announced. The risk of possible exposure would be much too high for both my clients and myself, especially since many of us have underlying health concerns which compromise our immune systems.

The scientific research so far is pretty conclusive in one aspect: being in close quarters (like my cozy windowless office where physical distancing is an impossibility no matter how creative I get about furniture arrangements) for an extended period of time (such as hour-long sessions) is a sure way to increase the chances of exposure. When you couple this with the fact that my office is in a shared space with about 30 other health professionals, each with their own clients sitting in the waiting room, the risks of possible contagion only increase.

Simply put, I cannot in good conscience needlessly put my community at risk when my psychotherapy and life coaching services can be just as effective via telehealth until this serious health crisis improves.

So, I will be adopting a measured, phased-in approach. By this, I mean that I will continue to offer only telephone and video sessions for the time being, until further notice. I will continue to monitor Toronto’s infections rates as the city slowly begins reopening, and will also look to guidance from my regulatory college (whose mandate is to protect YOU, the public) and professional association (whose focus is to protect health professionals). As things begin to improve, I will first begin re-offering walk-and-talk sessions. In-office sessions will be offered only in the final phase, once I am more confident that I can resume such sessions without risking anyone’s health and safety.

I will email all my active clients as I move from one phase to another, so you will always be the first to know when things change. I will also be updating my website blog as I move from one phase to the next.

To all my clients who have continued working with me via telehealth through the greatest health crisis we have ever lived through, thank you for trusting me with your wellbeing! I am confident that we will all come out of this stronger and with powerful insights into the values we hold near and dear to our hearts. As a dear friend reminded me over our Facetime chat just this past weekend, sometimes it takes a negative life event to launch us into something far greater. While some may look to this painful time to sink into defeat, grief, loss and depression, I trust that every member of my beloved community will instead look to it as an opportunity for lasting, positive metamorphosis.

Each of us will come back stronger, braver, and more focused than ever before. Of this, I have no doubt.

 

 

 

What is Depression?

If you ask a group of people who’ve suffered from clinical depression to define the illness, you’ll hear a variety of answers. Depression is a very personal experience that millions of people all over the world experience.

Different people manifest different symptoms, but one thing is certain: depression is a difficult illness that can seriously stall your life if left unresolved. Many people with depression describe it as a sense of despair that engulfs everything they do and everything they feel.

If you think being depressed is akin to feeling sad because your favourite team just lost the championship game, you really have no idea what suffering from a true depression is like. Depression is much deeper and more invasive than sadness or frustration.

Depression takes everything away from you; it saps your energy, focus, concentration, and especially your joy. You just don’t care about anything; nothing matters and even the people you love become unimportant. And worst of all, you begin to believe the critical voice inside that convinces you that the dark cloud will always be hovering over you.

Physical Concerns of Depression

Depression doesn’t only take its toll on your emotions and mental state; it can cause serious physical problems as well. Depression may cause you to either lose your appetite or eat incessantly. It also zaps your energy and motivation.

When you’re depressed, you tend to become inactive. This alone can cause a number of problems, but when added to some of the other physical side effects of depression, it’s easy to see why depression is such a serious illness.

In addition, depression can lead to:

1. Lack of sleep. Depression can cause insomnia, which strips the body of the necessary sleep to function properly.

2. Poor nutrition. When depressed, many people fail to take in proper nutrients. It takes too much effort to plan and prepare a meal. This can cause several health problems.

3. Aches and pains. If anyone tells you that your mental state has no effect on your physical state, they’re wrong. When you’re depressed, the chemicals in the brain that signal pain are as affected as the chemicals in your brain that help you feel happy. Physical aches and pains are increased, which in turn, kicks in the sad feelings and the cycle begins again.

4. Hygiene issues. Someone suffering from depression doesn’t have the energy or the motivation to be concerned with self-care. Simply put, even routine self-care activities like brushing your teeth or showering daily can seem overwhelming.

What are the Symptoms of Depression?

These are some specific things those with depression experience:

• Persistent sadness
• Hopelessness
• Lack of motivation
• Feelings of guilt
• Difficulty making decisions
• Insomnia or trouble sleeping
• Irritability / repressed anger
• Difficulty concentrating / brain fog
• Loss of interest in things that once interested them
• Feelings of worthlessness / low self-esteem
• Changes in appetite
• Physical pain
• Lack of energy and fatigue
• Changes in sexual appetite
• Suicidal thoughts / suicidal ideation

One thing about depression is certain: it’s a serious condition and should be taken seriously.

As untreated depression progresses, it feeds on itself like a snowball rolling downhill. The longer someone is depressed, the worse the depression gets until they see no way out of it at all. They become resigned to being miserable all the time.

Depression can be caused by trauma, the change of seasons, losing a loved one, change of life transition, or even a chemical imbalance in the body. Emerging research has even connected poor gut health with poor brain health.

The treatment for depression usually involves psychotherapy and/or medication that helps alter brain chemistry. In addition to these two treatments, naturopathic medicine can also be a helpful adjunct to help bring your gut health back to optimal levels.

If you know someone who is depressed, the best thing you can do is be his or her friend. Talk to them and help them through this period. Encourage them to seek medical and psychotherapeutic care to treat their illness.

If you think you may be depressed, talk to your family doctor for a proper diagnosis, and seek out the help of a registered psychotherapist.

Above all, know that depression is a treatable illness – despite what your inner critic might be whispering in your head. Depression doesn’t have to ruin your life! With proper help and support, you can conquer your depression, move past it, and go on to live a joyful life.

Find Your Purpose in a Few Minutes With a Few Questions

Toronto Mindful Solutions Clinic

It’s not easy to figure out how to spend the rest of your life. But, it doesn’t have to be extremely challenging either. By asking yourself a few, simple questions, you can learn enough about yourself to figure it all out. There may not be a 100% perfect answer, but you can figure out a great answer in a short amount of time.

 

What are you meant to do?

Consider these questions to help you determine your purpose:

1. What am I interested in? These can be things you like to do, learn about, and think about. What activities cause you to lose track of time? Make a list of your 10 favourite activities. Now, think of ways you can make a living in a related way. For example:

• If you love teaching, there are many ways to instruct others. You could be an actual teacher, a personal trainer, teach meditation classes, or be a sports coach.
• Do you love sports? Think coach, athletic trainer, gym teacher, and so on.

2. What do I want to learn more about? Is there a topic that fascinates you so much that you spend your free time learning more about it? You might be fascinated with astronomy or inventing a better mousetrap. What really piques your interest?

3. What am I naturally good at? Ideally, you can find something that you love that you also have a natural talent for. What are some things you do better than the average person? Make another list.

4. What did I want to do when I was a child? What did you dream about being when you were growing up? Sometimes your first ideas are the best ideas. Think about your childhood dreams and ask yourself why you chose that field. You might get a few clues.

5. What are my values? What is most important to you? Adventure? Helping others? Personal development? Overcoming challenges? Your purpose has to be aligned with your values.

6. What is my gut telling me? There’s a time for logic and reason. This might not be one of those times. Sometimes, the best choice doesn’t necessarily make a lot of sense. What is your soul trying to tell you? Listen.

7. Why? Why does a particular field appeal to me? If you understand that, you can find other options that might be more suitable to you. Supposed you have an interest in being a physician. Make a list of why that appeals to you:

• Help people
• Intellectually challenging
• Avoid an office environment
• Get respect from family and the general public
• Financially rewarding: Have nice things and retire early

Now… Ask yourself what else you could do that would meet those needs of yours. For example, you could volunteer on the weekend, you could learn to speak Mandarin, and you could become a successful real estate investor.

8. Choose. Making a choice can be scary. But if you’ve narrowed down your options, it’s hard to make a poor choice. Making no choice at all ensures that your life stays stuck.

It can be unsettling if you don’t know what to do with your life. So, spend a little time with yourself and figure it out. It’s important to make a decision, because the cost of never deciding is significant. Look to your values and preferences and you’ll find a life path that appeals to you. All it takes is asking yourself a few pertinent questions.

How to Ward Off Seasonal Depression

Toronto Mindful Solutions Clinic

Today is the third Monday of January – aka Blue Monday – claimed to be the most depressing day of the year. While this internet-made day has long since been debunked by science, there’s no denying that seasonal depression is very real.

Seasonal depression is a more common term for a condition named SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). SAD is a recurring depression that often occurs in the late fall and winter months. Contrary to common belief, you can successfully combat seasonal depression long before you feel its effects.

Try these tips to ward off seasonal depression:

1. Mimic the sun. Make sure to get some sun on your face for at least 20 minutes a day; failing that, consider purchasing a sunlamp that mimics the rays of the sun. Light therapy is one of the highest recommended treatments for seasonal depression.

2. Nurture your social life. Being socially active is an important part of keeping up your spirits during the wintertime. Have a weekly dinner with your friends. If the weather is nasty, host a dinner in your home or head over to your friends’ house for a nice evening. If the weather allows, head out for a weekly catch-up with the girls or poker night with the boys.

3. Boost your vitamins intake. Consider speaking with your family doctor and/or naturopathic doctor to see whether taking a course of vitamin supplements can help you. For instance, ample research shows that Seasonal Affective Disorder is prevalent when vitamin D stores are typically low. Get your levels properly tested.

4. Take a winter vacation. There’s a reason millions of Canadians are known as snowbirds! Head to a warm, sandy beach for a fresh perspective. Pack your bags and take a two-week vacation to Florida, Hawaii, or even a cruise in the Bahamas. Just two weeks, or even less if your schedule is rigid, will make a world of a difference on your mood. If you’re low on funds, consider nixing your summer vacation in favour of a yearly winter vacation. Generally, SAD recurs every winter. Instead of fleeing your home during the warm summer months, think of a winter vacation as your secret weapon against combating seasonal depression.

5. Practice daily mindfulness. By now, you likely have heard all about the benefits of daily meditation, right? These include lowered blood pressure, increased immunity, better sleep, and a reduction of symptoms associated with depression, anxiety, and pain related to stress.

In essence, you can effectively combat seasonal depression by being aware of both your behaviour and environment. Make a conscious effort to boost your own spirits and refrain from slipping into a rut. Of course, if you know that you’re suffering from a debilitating episode of SAD, contact a family doctor to ensure that your condition is safely treated and whether you need medication or not. And also consider working with a licensed psychotherapist to help you find the right coping strategies for you.

With a few small changes, you can survive – and even thrive – through the dreary winter season. Spring is right around the corner and the sunny weather and new perspective you crave can be yours, even before spring gets here.

Are You Following Your Own Path, or Someone Else’s?

It’s not easy to find your way through the world. You might have interests that don’t coincide with the values of your parents or with those of western society. It’s important to remember that everyone is different, and while the status quo might work for the majority of the population, it doesn’t work for everyone.

To have a truly fulfilling life, you must live it on your own terms. There are plenty of forces willing to tell you what your path should be:

1. Parents. Your parents want you to be happy and successful. They love you, and they want you to thrive and blossom. Many of them may also like to be able to brag to their friends about their children. 🙂  Most parents tend to be practical in their advice. Just remember that you’d have a similar life to them if you always followed their advice. That might be good or bad. Keep in mind that you are not the same as your parents. You also have your own life to live. You owe it to yourself to live a life that’s right for YOU.
2. Educational system. The educational system wants to turn out productive people into society that conform to their ways of thinking. This might be great for society, but it might not always be in your best interests. What if you want to be a rockstar, or take a few years to travel and write a book, own an alpaca farm, or become a Buddhist monk in Sri Lanka? Your school guidance counsellor might be less than supportive of such pursuits!
3. Society as a whole. We, in the Western world, live in a society that places a strong value on achievement, financial resources, and personal possessions. We’re supposed to get married to a “perfect” partner, have a few kids, and own a house in the suburbs. It’s natural to want to play that game because we’ve all been so deeply indoctrinated to view these as measures of a “successful” life, even if it doesn’t quite suit our true nature. It’s nice to have the admiration of society, our ego minds crave this type of recognition. But the type of life dictated by society isn’t alwaysa good fit for everyone. There are plenty of people that are highly successful by society’s criteria that are profoundly unhappy with how their lives turned out. 

Toronto Mindful Solutions Clinic

 

As you can see, plenty of people are willing to influence your choice of lifestyle and career. But it’s unlikely that their advice will be optimal for you all the time. Be an individual and find the path that works best for you. Find and follow your own path with these strategies:

1. Ask yourself what you really want to do. Don’t say that you don’t know, because you do know. You’re just afraid to allow it to see the light of day. You might be concerned what others think, or you might be afraid that you’re not capable of doing it. Deep down, if you turned inward and listened to the whispers in your heart, you know what you want. Ask yourself what you would do if you could do anything, and then listen to the answer.
2. Decide that you’re going to follow your path. One of the biggest obstacles to success is failing to make a true decision. A decision only occurs when you shut yourself off to other possibilities. If you frequently change your mind, you’re not making true decisions.
3. Make a plan. Rome wasn’t built in a day. So set up a schedule of daily tasks that will bring you closer to living the life that you have chosen. In doing so, you’re practically guaranteed success provided you don’t give up.

Your life is your responsibility. If you find yourself stuck living someone else’s definition of success, you’ll find yourself unhappy. The people that influenced you to live this way will be off living their own best lives. Take control of your destiny and find your own path. Your life will be more interesting, more satisfying, and uniquely your own!

8 Steps to Realizing Your Full Potential

Toronto Mindful Solutions Clinic

Most people look back on their life and wonder what they could have accomplished if they’d only been more decisive and committed. You can avoid that kind of regret by choosing to become the best you can at something. Think about it for a moment. What do you want to master?

Follow this process to be the best version of you that you can be:

1. Assess your strengths. Your greatest potential will involve one or more of your strengths. Most strengths can be applied to any endeavour with a focused approach. The first step is to identify these strengths. What are you better at than nearly everyone you know? What has always been easy for you? What are you best at?
2. Assess your weaknesses. Do the same with your weaknesses. While weaknesses can, and often should, be strengthened, it’s helpful to avoid them at all costs when it’s time to get busy. Relying on your weaknesses increases the odds of failure.
3. What do you like? It’s not just about effort and skill. It’s about putting in enough time to be successful. That’s easier to do when you enjoy what you’re doing. You might have great potential to be the world’s greatest golfer, but if you can’t stand the game, you’ll never do it. More importantly, you wouldn’t want to anyway. Think about what you enjoy doing. What activities cause you to lose track of time?
4. What do you want to accomplish? Now that you know your strengths, weaknesses, and likes, you can decide what you want to master. You can’t do much without making this important decision. Everything going forward depends on this decision. Think carefully. Consider how you will measure mastery. Is it when you can drive a golf ball 300 yards 9 times out of 10? Play a specific piece of music on the piano? Earn $1 million in a year? How will you know you’ve won?
5. Avoid distractions. Distractions are the enemy to progress. We all have things we enjoy doing that accomplish nothing other than providing temporary amusement. Make a list of your favourite distractions. How willing are you to avoid these items? This is a good indicator of your potential for success.
6. Find a mentor. You can’t reach your ultimate potential without a mentor, coach, advisor, or whatever title you prefer. It can shave years off your learning curve and help you to avoid the mistakes you’re destined to make on your own. Seek out the best in your field and make contact. At the very least, read books on the topic written by experts. The library can provide you with plenty of mentors.
7. Make a commitment. Mastery requires commitment. It’s the commitment to develop yourself, overcome obstacles, and to put in the necessary time. It’s the commitment to find a mentor and to avoid those appealing distractions.
8. Focus on improvement. Seek regular small improvements. Consistent progress is the key to mastery. Mastering anything can take years, or even decades. If perfection is your daily goal, you’ll be disappointed. Weekly progress is an attainable goal that can keep you going. Have you ever truly committed yourself to anything? Now can be that time. What interests you? What do you want to know inside and out? Mastering anything can give you a new level of pride and confidence.

It takes some sacrifice to master anything because you have less time available for other pursuits. However, most people find it’s worth the sacrifice. So…. What do you want to master?

Top 10 Powerful Words to Keep You Motivated

Toronto Mindful Solutions Clinic

No matter where you are on your life journey, setbacks can cause disappointment and a loss of momentum.

Whether it’s a new career you’re working towards or an overall appreciation of life, every step towards fulfilment can seem financially, emotionally, or psychologically draining from time to time.

To boost your confidence, here’s a list of the top 10 power words and tips to keep you motivated and passionate, no matter what life throws your way:

1. Purpose. Whenever you’re feeling discouraged or disappointed, always remember your original purpose. Reminding yourself of the original reason for venturing down your path in the first place will help refresh your mind when things go awry.
2. Planning. Though you may think that you’ve done enough planning towards the fulfilment of your goal, thinking it through again will help eliminate aspects of your plan of action that may be causing you setbacks. Put all your thoughts down on paper, from the smallest details to the larger movements. Being able to see the timeline of your mission will help you focus on taking one step at a time to reach your goals.
3. Acceptance. Accepting that you’re a human being who’s bound to have ups and downs is absolutely crucial to your success. Without this self-acceptance, you’ll be subject to a foggy mind that’s unable to think positively, clearly, and innovatively.  Acceptance of what hasn’t worked in the past helps you gain a better knowledge of what will work in the future.
4. Reward. When your motivation starts to wean, it’s crucial to give yourself rewards along the way. This is one of the best ways to stay motivated on your path to success. By giving yourself a taste of what you’re working for – whether it’s financial freedom, career responsibility, or your dream lifestyle – you won’t feel like you’re working so hard for nothing. This refreshes your mind and helps you work more productively.
5. Health. You know what this entails: moderate exercise, a healthy diet, and 7-8 hours of sleep per night. Feeling worn-down will make it almost impossible to pursue your goals and vision with the same clarity and vigour you had when you first set out. Take care of your basic needs first, and you’ll be strong enough to pursue your dreams.
6. Motivation. Research motivational books, CDs, and seminars. Sometimes hearing motivational tips from a different perspective can greatly motivate you to act and succeed. Find a source or two that touches you in some way and keep them close for those moments when you feel discouraged. After all, we all get discouraged at one time or another.
7. Organization. Ever feel depressed and worn out, and then you clean your surroundings and instantly feel more focused and motivated? The same applies to your goal. Organize and clean house when it comes to the operation of your goal.  Organizing yourself gives you a fresh start and a feeling of clarity. In doing so, you’ll be able to attack your short and long-term goals more vigorously and effectively.
8. Refresh. Refresh your plan with something new. It could be a different tactic, setting, or career. Whatever it is, break out of the pattern you’re in and try something new. Even if this new tactic doesn’t yield positive results immediately, at the very least it will make you aware of the availability of your options.
9. Networking. Reach out to people in your industry or those who share your life goal. You can do this a number of ways: check out local clubs, find a plethora of people online, or talk to existing contacts that may have already succeeded in your goal.  Having someone to voice your struggles, questions, and experience to will invigorate you to keep moving forward.
10. Action. Taking action, despite doubts and setbacks, will further your progress. By moving on, despite any pessimistic thoughts, you will motivate yourself by the sheer momentum of doing something proactive to change your circumstances.

Whenever you feel like your progress has stalled, or you simply want some quick inspiration, look to these 10 powerful words and strategies to spur you on. You’re sure to find something to get you back on track toward success!

7 Steps to Banishing a Limiting Belief

Limiting beliefs are dysfunctional ideas/beliefs that we make up about ourselves, others and the world around us. Like the name suggests, they inhibit and hold us back from positive growth. We all have them, to varying extents, but the good news is that there are ways to banish them for good. Ready? Here we go:

7 Steps To Banishing A Limiting Belief – Toronto Mindful Solutions Clinic

How Does Getting Psychotherapy Help?

Since psychotherapy (also known as counselling) is a rather misunderstood concept (not to mention often steeped in stigma), the suggestion that you see a therapist can be scary.

You may perceive getting therapy to mean that there’s something wrong with you. But this isn’t the case at all! While it may not be for everyone, counselling can be beneficial to most people at challenging points in their lives.

Although it’s important to recognize that therapy is not a panacea, it makes a difference every day in thousands of lives across the world. If you find that you have uncomfortable feelings of “stuckness” in your life, you may very well benefit from this working with a psychotherapist.

Consider these ways that therapy can help you:

1. Get an objective viewpoint: Counseling allows the opportunity to talk about your current challenges with someone who’s trained, impartial and objective. Open communication with your friends and loved ones is usually a good idea. However, there are times when you might find it more comforting and safe to share your feelings, innermost thoughts, and worries with a therapist.
2. Clarify your feelings: Many times, people begin therapy feeling confused and not really able to identify their emotions. A good therapist can assist you in recognizing your feelings. The therapeutic process can help you explore particularly troubling emotions and resolve them.
3. Learn to appropriately communicate: Being able to share honest, genuine feelings using more effective communication can enrich your relationships and help you succeed in your life. Once you learn to pay more attention to your feelings and share them with others, you’ll get more of what you want from life, whatever that may be. Most importantly, your life is more fulfilling when you live based on how you truly feel.
4. Get stress-relief: How many times do you have an opportunity to say whatever you want however you want with no repercussions later? It’s possible to liberate yourself from psychological pain by talking with a therapist. Therapy is a safe place to vent your negative feelings. Whether you’re feeling scared, hurt, angry, lonely, confused, stuck or other negative feelings, you can share it with your therapist, take a load off your chest, and gain clarity. For many, therapy is a sanctuary when they’re feeling overwhelmed with negativity in their life. This makes counselling a great stress reliever!
5. It’s all about you: When you go to therapy, the session is focused on your benefit. Your time with a psychotherapist is all about you. You can say whatever you want, and you won’t ever have to worry about being judged by the therapist, as they are trained to keep their personal feelings out of it.
6. Gain valuable insights: When you talk about yourself with someone who’s non-judgmental and objective, you’re truly tuned in to the moment and what you’re saying. Therapy provides a chance for you to hear yourself talk and share your own personal struggles. It may sound unusual, but people in counselling frequently have “a-ha” moments about something they shared. Your therapist will ask questions which encourage you to examine your current situation more thoroughly. After all, human difficulties are complex. Through this process, you can discover your motives and learn to understand yourself better. Developing insight and awareness into your feelings empowers you to set priorities about what’s most important to you and make choices that enable you to live the life you truly seek.
7. Bring out your strengths: With therapy, you can develop or gain confidence in your capacity to live a healthy, fulfilling life, while learning more about what makes you tick, and how to harness your strengths.

Simply put, working with a therapist can be one of the most profound gifts you can ever give yourself. Most likely, you’ll experience less stress, feel more satisfied and contented with your life after participating in counselling. If you find yourself struggling emotionally, remind yourself that therapy can help. Tell yourself that therapy is a crucial component of your self-care plan. And then commit to doing the work!